Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t buy bullshit

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Why are white women dating more black guys than ever?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Why did Kamala say immigrants eating cats isn’t real when there’s police bodycam footage of it happening?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

What should I do if I love someone who does not love me?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Why did Cartman love Heidi purely with heart, her being the first one he ever did, but then one day Butters tells him that all women are manipulative and then he began to believe that she was a bad person and pretended to be a victim?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Aaron Judge's 469-Foot Home Run in Kansas City Left Baseball World in Disbelief - Sports Illustrated

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

How is TikTok able to censor porn?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Can you share some of your favorite jokes that are not well-known but always make people laugh?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

What are some disadvantages of living in rural areas? What are the advantages?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Why are North Carolina Democrats against Mark Robinson? He is the modern Martin Luther King Jr. and the Democrats are being stupid for not voting him.

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

What are some fun/kinky things to do with your partner?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

What do you think about the NFA full auto band? Weapons built before 1986 can be transferred and registered? But we can't have an 87? But older weapons tend to be far more powerful. I think we should drop it. Input?

I can read

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I see through liars

Isn't it unfortunate for the Democrats that we Republicans are the masters of the universe who control everything while the Democrats control nothing?

I actually pay taxes

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Why do people have polyamorous relationships?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I can count

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have a reading level above third grade

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP